Duplicity Messages

[thenewnormal]

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[thenewnormal]

I don't need you to get me into trouble. You really think I won't be screaming into the void with or without your help? But I can't just sit on my hands and wait, either. So I'm going to be doing something, with or without you.

The question really is whether you honestly don't want me there or you're just saying that.

[ He adds the next words softly, words of experience that he rarely talks about. ]

None of us are good at this. And if they say they are, they're lying, maybe even to themselves, but still lying.

[angrycowboy]

[ Michael takes a breath. In his experience, his friends are very, very bad at giving him space when he asks for it.

Might as well try. ]

You need to do something without me.

I've gotta call Maria.

[thenewnormal]

[ Or maybe Alex has been too good about giving him space in the past. ]

That didn't actually answer my question. But yes, go talk to Maria.

[angrycowboy]

I'm pretty sure it did.

[ He's being cold, he knows that. He's not being what Alex needs him to be.

It's just...

When he said he wasn't good at this, he meant it. The only way Michael knows how to deal with loss is to turn in on himself. ]

I'm sorry, Alex. I don't know what else to say.

[thenewnormal]

Do you honestly want some time to yourself to process? Or is it more that you don't know what to do if I came over? Do you want to be alone or do you think you should be alone?

Completely different things.

[angrycowboy]

Alex, I don't want to see anyone.

[ Now there's frustration in his voice. He'll probably regret it later.

Probably. ]

I'll tell you when I do. Okay?

[thenewnormal]

Right.

[ And there's no frustration in his voice. Not yet. Maybe not for a while. ]

Go talk to Maria.

[angrycowboy]

Thanks.

Bye.

[ That was the first of a couple of very difficult conversations, and it was only about Kyle. God knows how many there need to be about Nick. ]]